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Is what you say and what you do different?1103

Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
What happened to saying what you will do and doing what you say?

Twice yesterday I was promised a certain outcome/situation in a very professional, or so I thought, exchange.

But then when push came to shove, the delivery just wasn't there.

I'd been sold a bill of goods. I'd been made promises that just weren't held up on the other end.

Contracts and court cases are not a solution. But then trust seems to certainly not be enough as well.

I don't know the answer. I prefer to trust. I like MOUs. I like to over deliver.

I also wish the other side would hold up their end as well. But that part continues to escape me.

What happened to integrity?

Or maybe I am just getting old.
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Teacher Rev private msg quote post Address this user
@Belew

There seems to be a pervasive "fake it 'til you make it" modus about these days. Gurus preach it. Business coaches teach it. And many practitioners believe it. It starts out as cover for lack of knowledge, position, experience, but slowly creeps into the individual's soul until they find themselves having to promise what they cannot deliver and, often unintentionally, taking advantage of others in their failure.

It is sad, really, as the effort spent in creating, and maintaining, the ruse, both in their public face and in their own belief, is actually more than enough to do it right, to be honest, and then to actually deliver on one's promises. In the long run their would be more profit, greater success, and real stature. Instead they settle for fakery, in-authenticity, and lack of personal integrity. They lose.

It is annoying, often costly, to the recipient of their scheming, but in the final outcome, the loser is obvious. And, whether they die rich or broke, they always die never having experienced, never having known, the awesome joy of real success. It is a mystery that cannot be grasped by the wannabe, by anyone not willing to make the journey.

You know this, Bill, even if you don't know you know it. Set it aside. Move forward.
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
@Rev You write seemingly from the voice of experience.

Move on I will. Do my own thing in my own world for people I love and who's trust I have earned so as to not disappoint.

Give more, expect less. Set the example rather than require it of the 'other side.'

Thanks for sharing your words of wisdom.
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Member bdaoust private msg quote post Address this user
Back to some of my corporate examples: People vying for contracts in the training world, promising to deliver high end content and have the expertise to do so. In reality: they bid on the contract based on the experience of those they may or may not hire to take care of the business, if they get it. Then when the time to deliver is in place, the actual offering is late, and quite often only half of what was expected. Basically we started putting unreasonable things into the RFPs and knew we would get what we actually wanted when delivery time was in place. So much for expectations and over-delivery! It seems it is always lop-sided when it comes to agreements no matter how hard you work on your part. You are right - give more, expect less.
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Member tienny private msg quote post Address this user
@belew I can understand your position and have been there.
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
@bdaoust

Sadly it is give much more....and get much less.

Give and take relationship. I give. ... they take.
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Member morrnel private msg quote post Address this user
What I am understanding is you asked for two things yesterday for future delivery? Perhaps you have the wrong expectations.

Do you have an idea how long it should take to complete? What analysis did you do to build the trust? Maybe the other dudes didn't trust you?
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
@morrnel

You sound like my wife. When smth goes wrong it must be my fault. 8-)

They said, "we will have this ready for you when you bring that." I brought way more than 'that' and they way under delivered 'this.'
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Member jycmba private msg quote post Address this user
@Belew - you're right that no contract replaces trust.

Maybe I've been "lucky" but in each case personal relationship has trumped "legally binding" -

No client or student of mine has ever asked for a refund. I suppose part of it was the confidence that I delivered and often over-delivered what I promised.

With businesses that I've helped to sell the new owners grew them into bigger successes. Again, I knew that I wasn't selling a bill of goods that I wouldn't want to be stuck with.

Here's my response to a Quora question where the person said "There are also things they do that I ethically disagree with in their personal lives."
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Member morrnel private msg quote post Address this user
@Belew, LOL, insults will get you nowhere
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Member lunar_ranger private msg quote post Address this user
@bdaoust We've had a recent experience with this one- with some slight differences.
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Member bdaoust private msg quote post Address this user
@morrnel WEll since I was working for a very major player in the tech industry and the major player getting the contract was also a well known - it was more politics that real delivery - sigh...some things just don't change in Silicon Valley....
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Teacher SusanDay private msg quote post Address this user
I always over deliver, give 110% and work hard not to let anyone down no matter how 'small' they seem. That way I know I'm not like the fakers and over promisers / under deliverers. There's little else I can do and it's everything I can do to set myself apart from them.
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Teacher Rev private msg quote post Address this user
@SusanDay

Bravo! You might be surprised just how rare that is. Good for you for taking that stand. Sometimes it can't be easy. Nice.
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Member lunar_ranger private msg quote post Address this user
Always better to under-promise and over-deliver.
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Top Contributor Steve private msg quote post Address this user
@lunar_ranger the problem with under promising is that sometimes the other guy tells a better story and gets the gig. So perhaps the best thing is to pack in so much value that no one else can compete.
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
@SusanDay Who made you logo/img? It's pretty cool.
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
@Steve @lunar_ranger

Promise to deliver all they expect and more. Then deliver even more yet.
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Teacher Rev private msg quote post Address this user
@Steve

I agree. I tend to see under promising -- typically used to make the outcomes look better -- is just another form of fraud. Perhaps it could be called "pre-fraud".

Instead of trying to maneuver to get jobs, trying to out-maneuver the other guy, why not spend the effort learning how to offer better quality, do better work, and deliver more for the best price possible.

The word will get out. You'll find yourself getting more jobs -- even jobs you didn't know were out there. It's foundational to inbound marketing.
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
@Rev

My problem is everyone wants to hire the other guy...then use up all their money ... come to me and expect me to clean it up ... for free.

Uh, no.
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Member morrnel private msg quote post Address this user
I wouldn't say under promise and I'd be careful about over delivering. Promise that you deliver what is asked for and deliver it making room to deliver more if needed.

But then if they keep over delivering, then I come to expect it and if they don't, I'm let down.

Doesn't matter is the product is real or virtual.
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Top Contributor Steve private msg quote post Address this user
With prospects I work completely differently now ...
Prospect comes to me ...

I make prospect do something ... typically fill in a long form giving me lots of details and answers to questions other people don't ask.

I make the prospect wait a while...

If local we have a meeting, 45 minutes working to my agenda ...

I will submit a value style based quote rather than a specification type quote ... this is, if I submit a quote... a lot of the time, we will agree a price and move forward prior to this ....

My process is designed to take the power away from the client... and to give it to me, I am the prize the client wants because I can deliver ... this means I don't have to compete on price and instead simply push the value.

As to over delivering ... my clients tend to work with me for years on monthly retainers so... all I have to do, is to consistently deliver month after month.

I have even had clients come to me and say, charge me more monthly because I didn't realize what you were actually doing ...

Hope this helps you see how I try and position myself as the prize, instead of you valuing the client as the prize...
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
You are the prize @Steve. 8-)

And I am one of your converts and new testimonials ....and just getting warmed up, too!
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Top Contributor Steve private msg quote post Address this user
Lots and lots of prizes in these forums ... that's why I hang here ... it's not often you get awesome advice, freely given by such people ... and best of all, you know you'll get honest feedback and that to me is priceless ...

I value everyone here in these forums.
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Teacher Rev private msg quote post Address this user
@Steve

Your approach is very much mine. I need to do something with the form process, though.

I actually had a client speak to me about that. The got a very bad deal from a web designer and came to me to get things fixed. They liked what I did for them, satisfied with quality, timing, and price, however they said the other guy -- the one who had done the unsatisfactory job -- had a nifty form for information gathering and they liked it better than my live interrogative.

I guess I should spend a bit of time with a form generator. Care to share your form? I could use the ideas and the time saving it might produce.
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Teacher Rev private msg quote post Address this user
@Belew

"Uh, no."

Exactly!
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
@Rev

"Pretend" to be a customer to the guy who did a bad job. Get his form...say 'never mind.'
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Top Contributor Steve private msg quote post Address this user
@Rev here is the form I use...

https://website-designs.com/online-growth-worksheet/
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Member Davia private msg quote post Address this user
@steve great form! It may be lengthy but I wished I had been asked all that info from the get go!

People who are serious about their business and growing it will not complain about filling out a form. They should realize that that is experience talking. A newbie would not be as "put" together as an experienced person.
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Forum Owner Belew private msg quote post Address this user
@Davia @Steve doesn't do junk. 8-)
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